Going Legitimate
I think God's been pressing the issue into my heart for a while now. Going legitimate with the music that I have. Morality wise, there really is no question of what is the right thing to do. However, I've found human nature tends to be very good at finding ways to delay doing the right thing. In my case, It was me saying that if I know I'm going to buy the CD later on, I'm justified by owning it now. It doesn't work that way. Deep inside there's this gut feeling was telling me to act now.
How I chose to go legitimate was what made the difference. I wanted to go face to face with ever song that I owned, fully exposing the guilty culprit that I am by typing out each song. An otherwise tedious process if not for listening to my music one last time. One last time together before we part ways. Selecting what songs to play is where it got interesting. When you know you're saying good-bye to something you always want to cherish the moment, or in this case, listen to the songs that go beyond just sounding good, but that are meaningful to you personally.
Several relevations dawned on me that very moment. Saying good-bye to a majority of my music was surprising easy when I realized that what I had was merely superficial. There was very little attachment to the songs, more like a propietary arrangement. I only enjoyed owning them, using them as files to get access to more music. That was it, a very temporary glee would spurn from me at the ownership of something new. Perhaps the opportunity to appreciate my music on a deeper level was always there, but I just never tooked the chance to look into it. It's something I won't be able to find out till later on.
The other relevation came from the songs that that did matter to me. It's amazing how a song can awaken a memory long forgotten in a sea of newly formed memories, reminders of all the little musical phases you went through in your earlier years. It then dawned on me then that it wasn't the music that I valued so much, but the memories. Letting them go was tough for me, bucuase in that sense, I was potentially letting go of some fond memories that lead to so many life changing events. The toughest to let go was my worships songs that has stirred my soul so many times. To see for myself if it's my faith that brings me so much joy in the music, as it should be, or vice versa.
So, 800 deleted songs (thank goodness I'm not a download fanatic), 8 tossed out burnt CD's later I am now legitimate with my music. Music is such an integral part of my life and choosing to temporarily give up some of it up was very tough. But merely having a song without earning the right to have it is to miss out on the potentially bigger value behind it.
When I chose to gave up the music I didn't deserve in the first place, all I expected in return was a feeling of integrity and being less hypocritical. What in return was revisited memories I'm determined to remember, a new appreciation for music, writing inspiration and most importantly, a reconnection with God that wasn't very good as of late. Music is a wonderful privilege and I'm all for going legitimate. The trade off is worth it beyond imagination.
How I chose to go legitimate was what made the difference. I wanted to go face to face with ever song that I owned, fully exposing the guilty culprit that I am by typing out each song. An otherwise tedious process if not for listening to my music one last time. One last time together before we part ways. Selecting what songs to play is where it got interesting. When you know you're saying good-bye to something you always want to cherish the moment, or in this case, listen to the songs that go beyond just sounding good, but that are meaningful to you personally.
Several relevations dawned on me that very moment. Saying good-bye to a majority of my music was surprising easy when I realized that what I had was merely superficial. There was very little attachment to the songs, more like a propietary arrangement. I only enjoyed owning them, using them as files to get access to more music. That was it, a very temporary glee would spurn from me at the ownership of something new. Perhaps the opportunity to appreciate my music on a deeper level was always there, but I just never tooked the chance to look into it. It's something I won't be able to find out till later on.
The other relevation came from the songs that that did matter to me. It's amazing how a song can awaken a memory long forgotten in a sea of newly formed memories, reminders of all the little musical phases you went through in your earlier years. It then dawned on me then that it wasn't the music that I valued so much, but the memories. Letting them go was tough for me, bucuase in that sense, I was potentially letting go of some fond memories that lead to so many life changing events. The toughest to let go was my worships songs that has stirred my soul so many times. To see for myself if it's my faith that brings me so much joy in the music, as it should be, or vice versa.
So, 800 deleted songs (thank goodness I'm not a download fanatic), 8 tossed out burnt CD's later I am now legitimate with my music. Music is such an integral part of my life and choosing to temporarily give up some of it up was very tough. But merely having a song without earning the right to have it is to miss out on the potentially bigger value behind it.
When I chose to gave up the music I didn't deserve in the first place, all I expected in return was a feeling of integrity and being less hypocritical. What in return was revisited memories I'm determined to remember, a new appreciation for music, writing inspiration and most importantly, a reconnection with God that wasn't very good as of late. Music is a wonderful privilege and I'm all for going legitimate. The trade off is worth it beyond imagination.
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