Step Back

Ever had that feeling that you're just LOST? That's how I've felt for the longest time. A period where you can be physically there but not mentally or spiritually. I suppose its a good time to take one of those reality checks on where you're headed.

If there's one thing I've learned about myself is that I like to move and figure it out as I go along. I used to believe in the idea that there are several ways to go about doing something but there's only one way if you're ultimate goal is to honour God.

29"The most important one," answered Jesus, "is this: 'Hear, O Israel, the Lord our God, the Lord is one.^[a] 30Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.'<sup>[b]

Mark 12:29-30</sup>

Is there anything I'm doing to honour God??? Am I really giving my best day in and day out? More often, I'm guilty of getting by and hoping that's enough. Lately, God's just telling me that doing everything on a mediocre level doesn't bring Him glory.

11Dear friends, I urge you, as aliens and strangers in the world, to abstain from sinful desires, which war against your soul. 12Live such good lives among the pagans that, though they accuse you of doing wrong, they may see your good deeds and glorify God on the day he visits us.

1 Peter 2:11-12

I want to shine again. God grant me the humility to do so.

The Heart Of Worship

I love hearing the meaning behind worship songs. It brings so much depth to what you're singing when you understand what inspired the artist. Lyrics are so powerful and their depth is only matched by the events leading up to its creation.

http://www.theheartofworship.org/stories.shtml

So far I've checked out Paul Baloche - Offering and David Crowder's - Wholly Yours.

I want to learn how to play the song "Easy" by the Commodores.

Intuition

Intuition - "the immediate apprehension of an object by the mind without the intervention of any reasoning process" [Oxford English Dictionary]

Or in simpler terms: the apparent ability to acquire knowledge without a clear inference or reasoning process.

Or from wikipedia:

“Intuition is a combination of historical (empirical) data, deep and heightened observation and an ability to cut through the thickness of surface reality. Intuition is like a slow motion machine that captures data instantaneously and hits you like a ton of bricks. Intuition is a knowing, a sensing that is beyond the conscious understanding — a gut feeling. Intuition is not pseudo-science.”

I think this is something God's given me. Not because it's something I am on Myers Briggs just because there's been so many times I could sense an outcome before it happens. No rationale explanation or evidential proof. It's probably because I draw on lots of previous experiences and spend so much time observing that I can pick up patterns fairly quickly. Perhaps it's the crazy analyst side of me that enjoys trying to understand how someone is put together personality wise and have learned to project it.

It's a gift to see beyond the surface. Anyways, I had another one of those "intuitive" moments where the other person was stunned that I knew the answer before they could tell me. Alright, enough blathering. :)

Downtime

Downtime is a wonderful thing and I treasure every moment I get.

The introvert in me needs my alone time to recharge my batteries. In those moment, I've been getting reacquainted with a favourite past time of mine stemming back from my highschool days. That's right, watching cooking shows. I like learning things that are creative and practical. Yay for Food Network.

Recently I watched an episode on how to make fresh italian ricotta/spinach cannelloni, clams and potato au gratin. Now if only I can get my hands on a fresh pasta roller.....

IMLC One Year Later

It's been over a year since the IMLC mission's conference. Tsing messaged me on facebook saying how happy she was to meet us a year ago. I agree. I'm blown away by what's happened since then. God is good on so many levels. It'd take me forever to go through the many ways God's blessed me from that trip. I'll keep it short and say I'm thankful to have gotten to know everyone I've met and I treasure what I have. You all know who you are.

Foundation

One of the toughest lessons I've been learning at work is your software platform is only as good as the database it runs on. In other words, if the integrity of your database is shot, your software is useless. There's no other way around it. What I also learned is that this is something that should be rectified at all costs. Picture it like a crack in your foundation. Your structure will not last too long if it isn't fixed. Cut corners at your own peril.

Spiritually its the exact same thing. Devotional and prayer time are the foundations of your spiritual life. The moment that gets knocked down, the rest of you is in peril. These are things that we MUST fight for. God absolutely yearns to commune with us in our devotional time and that's something worth coming to his table for. Even more so because God is dynamic and his plans are dynamic, we must be refreshed constantly to do his will. Can we really afford to be lackadaisical about it?

Demolition experts know that the most effective way to implode a building is the take out it supporting pillars. Satan knows this as well. All he has to do is chip away at it.

Instead of coming to God to carry me though the busy storm I always seem to be in, I begun to ask why am I going through this never ending storm. I can't help but believe there are multiple lessons he wishes to teach me. This is one of them. You must fight to keep your foundation intact.

Drinking Swill?

Edwin McManus made an point about how we can get so used to our current environments that we're not even aware there's something better out there. His example was talking about how he'd always have meat cooked well done growing up to burn off the bacteria. For him, this was normal, what he was used to. He once tried to order a steak well done at a steakhouse he used to work at, but the chef refused to cook the steak in that manner. (Thank goodness)

The chef instead makes a deal and tells Edwin he'll cook him two steaks, one medium rare and if he doesn't like it, he'll cook another one. Edwin describes how the medium rare steak looks undercooked and unappealing but the moment he tastes it, he's blown away!! He didn't know steak could taste like that because he'd been so accustomed to charred, well-done meat.

We too can get so accustomed to what we know, we forget what's out there. He makes another analogy that if you drink swill (poor quality beverage) enough your tastebuds get accustomed to it and you forget what a really good beverage tastes like.

The horror. Can you imagine not being able to recognize the drink of life because we take on all the swill the world offers instead? Makes me wonder what I'm settling for.